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The “Bert And Ernie” Email Formula

 

Let me ask a very serious question:

Who is your favorite Sesame Street character?

My favorite would have to be Bert and Ernie.

As a kid growing up, I found those two to be fascinating.

The typical scene would be Bert sitting in his green chair reading or whatever, while Ernie was in the background clowning around. And the more Ernie clowned around, the more pissed off Bert would get.

It was the classic “straight guy funny guy” routine.

Then there was Ernie’s iconic laugh. It kinda sounded like: “KEEHEEHEEHEE!” (pretty close, huh?)

Brilliant stuff.

Do they still show Sesame Street?

If they do, I bet you it’s been so censored and watered down because of today’s Politically correct gone wild world, I’d barely recognize it.

Now, I know what you’re wondering.

You’re wondering if there’s a section in this email that will show you how to rake in more bucks with email, right?

Well, fear not my little marketing crony, because I’m about to lay it upon you.

Here goes:

In all my promotional emails, I like to use the “Bert and Ernie” formula.

I’ll explain.

We all have a little Bert in us and we also have a little Bernie in us.

I actually have a lot of Bert in me. In other words, I love to sit down with a good book and read in my office or outside in the tranquility of my backyard. I like to ponder semi profound thoughts, and I love to pass on my knowledge to others. In fact, I can get incredibly serious.

My wife will often look at me and ask: “what’s wrong?”

And I always reply, “What do you mean? Nothing is wrong.”

I guess it’s because when I’m in work mode, I get so focused that I must appear angry. Who knows?

Now, when I’m not working, my inner Ernie comes out.

This is when my wife and kids know they can talk to me and know t get a response other than, “Uh, what did you say?” Instead, they will get a cheerful and snappy reply with a smattering of humor and a touch of charm or an answer that is just complete nonsense or downright childish.

In other words, I stop being a glum bum and become fun to be with.

So how does all this apply to email marketing?

Here’s how:

Listen, when most business owners sit down to write a promotional email, they sabotage themselves by suppressing their inner Ernie.

And the net result?

A freakin’ boring email.

Not acceptable.

Look, if you want your emails to cut through people’s apathy and dismissiveness towards promotional emails…

....You Must Release Your Inner Ernie!

That is if you want your emails to cut through people’s apathy and dismissiveness towards promotional emails

David Ogilvy, the man they called The Father of Advertising once stated: “You can’t bore someone into buying from you.”

Truer words were never spoken.

Listen: A promotional email that bores your subscribers is about as useless as Bert and Ernie on a velcro bed!

Yup, your subscribers will remain stuck in their apathy and their only movement will be their index finger clicking delete on your boring and vapid email.

But how do you write compelling and engaging emails?

How do you come up with content ideas?

How do you plug your product or service without being too pushy or salesy?

How do you create an insatiable desire for your product or service with words (copywriting)?

How do you write with personality?

How….

Enuff with the questions!

All thy questions are answered here: The Maverick’s Email Playbook

OK, I’m done.

Geez, Kelvin, you don’t have to finish your emails so abruptly, do you?

Nope.

I just like to.

Hey, didn’t I say no more questions?

I’m out.

 

Kelvin

Email Marketing Maverick

Hey, Kelvin, do you have any copywriting products?

Aha…I thought you’d never ask.

I sure do.

However, they are very expensive, and if you’ve just stumbled onto my website and don’t know me from a can of paint, you’d be nuts to buy any of my products. After all, I could be a complete copywriting novice dressed up in guru clothing. Hell, the internet has no shortage of those.

Listen: I believe you should put someone’s content to the test before shelling out your hard earned. Know this: I want to help you drag in more sales for your business before you even think about giving me a single penny. 

And that, dear website visitor, is why all my new subscribers get the following two perks:

NEW SUBSCRIBER PERK #1 - The 10-Minute Copywritng Speed Course

Fast-track your way to writing persuasive sales copy. I’m talking about copy that stomps on peoples’ greed glands while sounding credible and believable. Not easy to do. That’s why I created the 10-minute copywriting speed course. (You’re welcome)

I don’t care if you’re a sniveling beginner or a grizzled veteran, this will help you write copy that opens both minds and wallets!

FACT: most people suck at writing promotional emails...

And yet… people still seem to make email marketing profitable – lame email copy and all.

Even the most clueless of business owners who add email to their marketing arsenal will see an increase in business.

Email, dear website visitor, is a very forgiving marketing medium. And therein lies a golden opportunity. If you learn just a little email copy (as opposed to normal copywriting – yes…there’s a difference), you can truly work wonders with email marketing. Look, I could wax lyrical about email copy all day long, but let me get straight to the point:

Email and sales go together like drunk and disorderly, and…I want to prove to you how easy it is to write emails people love to read and buy from. The notion that you need to be well versed in direct response marketing and be a certified copywriting pro is just beautiful nonsense. Not saying that won’t help… of course it’d help. What I am saying is that email is a very different animal, thus, you can get away with not possessing a lick of copywriting knowledge. If you’re serious about boosting your business’s sales, you’re gonna love perk #2 …

NEW SUBSCRIBER PERK #2 - The Ultimate Email Cheat-Sheet

Don’t let their simplicity fool you. These 17 email “types” are shockingly effective for selling products and services.

“Serious business owners and marketers need only subscribe”

NOTE: The 10-Minute Copywritng Speed Course and The Ultimate Email Cheat-Sheet will be delivered to your inbox immediately upon signing up.