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Piss And Tell: Stream Your Way to Success

Dear subscriber,

Much like today’s subject line…

… the following topic may make some of you wince.

It will have others shaking their heads in disgust.

And some of you are gonna bail out faster than a squirrel on a power line.

And you know what? All those responses would be justified.

Because today’s topic is a little gross, even by my standards.

But let me tell you, I’m not just some sicko spouting off for no reason. No, no, no. When I talk a little blue or distasteful, it’s for a good reason.

You’ll see – that is if you’ve got the stomach.

Okay, enough throat-clearing. Let’s rip off this band-aid. Today’s kinda disturbing topic is…

… Urination!

That’s right. Drain the weasel, splatter the bladder, making one’s bladder gladder. Call it what you will, it’s a topic best left alone. But as I said, there is a very good reason why I’m talking about this.

But first, I thought I’d share some interesting facts with you. Let’s call it:

3 Golden Facts About Urine:

According to a survey, 20 percent of people who use public swimming pools admit to urinating in them. Next time you see someone get out of the pool with red eyes, it’s probably not because of the chlorine.

Urea, the chemical found in urine, is also found in cigarette smoke. And you thought smoking couldn’t get any grosser. But seriously, if you need another reason to quit, just remember that every time you light up, you’re essentially putting a public restroom in your mouth. And no one wants that. Except maybe R. Kelly.

Did you know that approximately 225 men die each year while taking a leak over the side of their boat while fishing? That’s right, they go out to the middle of the ocean, unzip their pants, and then bam! They’re shark bait. Talk about a risky way to catch a fish. I mean, what happened to just using a damn fishing rod?

***

They were all 100% true by the way.

Now, let’s get deadly serious for a moment. When the average person relieves themselves, what is the benefit? Obviously, the benefit is they go from having an uncomfortably full bladder to having an empty bladder.

This is true of probably 99% of people on the planet.

But not so for Papa Maverick.

Nope. When Papa Maverick unleashes the yellow river, he not only gets the obvious benefit of an empty bladder, but he also gets two more benefits. And these benefits are truly invaluable.

Those benefits are as follows:

Benefit #1

I get physically stronger.

Benefit #2

I feel a surge of inspiration to pursue my business goals.

Considering that I visit the restroom about 6-7 times per day, this is a huge advantage for me.

How many people do you know who could say the same?

Let me answer that for you: none!

Can you imagine getting physically stronger and more inspired every time you take a leak?

Do you think that would compound over time?

And listen, if you think I’m talking about some type of supplement or pill, you are way off the mark. This has nothing to do with ingesting anything.

So what’s my secret?

Well, this is something I wasn’t going to tell anyone. But, I changed my mind. So, I wrote about it on page 16 of the May issue.

This is something anyone can do. But will people follow my lead? Hmm. My inner circle members are pretty damn smart, but I think this will really test their metal.

Awrite…

If you’re thinking about getting this issue, you better stop twiddling your thumbs and get moving. Because the clock is ticking on this bad boy, and you don’t wanna be the one left out in the cold when the party starts.

To grab this issue, race here: https://kelvindorsey.com/mavericks-inner-circle/

Your friend,

Kelvin

Email Marketing Maverick

Hey, Kelvin, do you have any copywriting products?

Aha…I thought you’d never ask.

I sure do.

However, they are very expensive, and if you’ve just stumbled onto my website and don’t know me from a can of paint, you’d be nuts to buy any of my products. After all, I could be a complete copywriting novice dressed up in guru clothing. Hell, the internet has no shortage of those.

Listen: I believe you should put someone’s content to the test before shelling out your hard earned. Know this: I want to help you drag in more sales for your business before you even think about giving me a single penny.

And that, dear website visitor, is why all my new subscribers get the following two perks:

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FACT: most people suck at writing promotional emails...

And yet… people still seem to make email marketing profitable – lame email copy and all.

Even the most clueless of business owners who add email to their marketing arsenal will see an increase in business.

Email, dear website visitor, is a very forgiving marketing medium. And therein lies a golden opportunity. If you learn just a little email copy (as opposed to normal copywriting – yes…there’s a difference), you can truly work wonders with email marketing. Look, I could wax lyrical about email copy all day long, but let me get straight to the point:

Email and sales go together like drunk and disorderly, and…I want to prove to you how easy it is to write emails people love to read and buy from. The notion that you need to be well versed in direct response marketing and be a certified copywriting pro is just beautiful nonsense. Not saying that won’t help… of course it’d help. What I am saying is that email is a very different animal, thus, you can get away with not possessing a lick of copywriting knowledge. If you’re serious about boosting your business’s sales, you’re gonna love perk #2 …

NEW SUBSCRIBER PERK #2 - The Ultimate Email Cheat-Sheet

Don’t let their simplicity fool you. These 17 email “types” are shockingly effective for selling products and services.

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