“Help! I’m being held in a Chinese bakery!!” ~ Fortune Cookie message
Dear subscriber,
There are two types of psychic mediums:
(1) One has no psychic ability but believes they do.
(2) One has no psychic ability and knows it.
Look, I don’t have anything against psychics, tarot card readers, or clairvoyants.
We’ve all gotta make a living, right?
Sure they’ve got their critics, but to be fair, these crazy mystics serve a purpose, even if it’s just to give some brief hope and emotional comfort.
Are their tactics dirty?
C’mon, that’s like wondering if anyone in the Tour de France takes steroids.
Of course their tactics are dirty. They’re dirtier than a nursing home’s bathroom floor!
They have to be. How else can they gonna get away with their future reading schtick?
Ah, yes, the psychic’s playbook is chock-full of dirty tricks. But their go-to trick is this:
Being Cleverly Vague!
Because their patrons (suckers) come in all ages, genders, and areas of interest, they must word their readings or predictions vaguely enough to fit anyone who hears it.
For example, you’ll never hear a psychic make a specific statement like this:
“You are currently deciding whether or not to leave your job and find a new career.”
No! Instead, they’d opt for the more vague, “At times, there has been a sense of uncertainty about your professional path.”
And of course, who hasn’t had uncertainty about their career every now and then? It’s practically universal.
Another example:
They won’t say: “In a week’s time, a friend of yours will have an affair and want you to cover for them.”
Nope. That’s far too specific and will only end up proving that their crystal ball is nothing but a fancy paperweight.
But they will say this:
“You might face unexpected changes or upheavals in the near future. Brace yourself for a shake-up.”
Of course, everyone on the planet will eventually face unexpected changes, it’s just a matter of time.
This covers the psychic’s mystical arse.
Now, I bet you think there’s no legit lesson to be had here, right?
You are very wrong.
If you’re a copywriter, you should take a leaf out of the psychic’s playbook. I’m serious. Meaning, you also should be careful not to make statements that are too specific. That’s right, there are times when you should go for vague over specific.
For example, Let’s say you sell a dating course for men. And you say this:
“Have you ever met a sexy blonde girl online who was just your type, got her phone number, had a good first date, and then suddenly stopped returning your calls?”
That type of specific copy will only trigger responses like this:
“Nah, I’m not into blondes. I’m into brunettes.” Or, “I’m Asian and only date Asian girls” Or, “Dating online? I don’t do that. I only date girls I meet in person”, and so on.
The point is, you are unwittingly causing many of your readers to shake their heads in disagreement.
Stoopid!
These little internal objections distract from your message. They brake flow. Instead, make your statements vague enough so your entire market can say, “Yeah, that’s how it is for me”, or “That’s how I feel!” or “Yup, I do that, too”
Persuasion must be smooth as silk. No glitches or rough patches are allowed. Keep your reader’s internal dialogue in agreement with what you’re saying, okay?
You can do that by being cleverly vague.
As far as copywriting tips go, this one’s pretty light on. I’ll admit that.
But worry not. If you want copywriting tips and techniques that require a little more chewing, you might want to check out this: https://kelvindorsey.com/5-hour-copy-course/
Your friend,
Kelvin
Email Marketing Maverick
P.S. Today’s email about psychics does raise a moral question: Is it okay to rob stupid people?
Send your answer to: kelvindorsey@tellmeyourpinnumber.com
